There’s something magical about polar bears.

They move with purpose. They don’t rush. They survive in the harshest conditions by staying calm, alert, and grounded—even when everything around them is frozen and wild.

If that sounds like what you wish your child could do when emotions flare up, you’re in the right place.

Because today, I want to introduce you to a favorite emotional regulation trick I call The Polar Bear Paws—a simple, powerful, and surprisingly fun mindfulness tool you can use anytime your child is dealing with big, messy, or confusing feelings.

🐾 Meet the Polar Bear Inside Us

I use this technique with kids all the time—and they love it. Why? Because it’s based on something cool (literally) and easy to imagine: becoming a polar bear.

Let’s set the scene:

Imagine a big, strong polar bear on an icy cliff. Something loud or scary happens nearby. Does the bear freak out and sprint in circles? Nope.

The bear pauses. It gets still. It breathes slowly and looks around. It waits. It uses this pause to decide what to do next—not just react on impulse.

And that, my dear caregivers, is exactly what we want to teach our kids to do with their feelings.

❄️ Why a Pause Is Powerful

When your child is overwhelmed—whether by frustration, fear, excitement, or disappointment—their brain isn’t in “think it through” mode. It’s in “uh-oh, react now!” mode.

The Polar Bear Pause helps them:

  • Slow down their racing thoughts

  • Feel safe in their body again

  • Reconnect to their decision-making power

And the best part? Once you teach them the visual of the bear, it becomes an anchor. A moment of pause they can carry with them anywhere—from the classroom to the dinner table to the dentist’s chair.

🐻‍❄️ How to Practice the Polar Bear Pause

You don’t need a glacier or a pile of snow. Just a moment, a little imagination, and a willingness to slow things down.

Here’s how you can teach it at home:

Step 1: Set the Scene

Say something like,

“Let’s pretend we’re polar bears on a snowy mountain. Something big just happened—and before we do anything, we pause like a wise polar bear.”

Step 2: Freeze Your Body

Ask your child to stop moving—just like a bear would if it heard a noise.

“Can we stand still like a statue? Can you feel your feet on the ground?”

Step 3: Take 3 Polar Breaths

“Breathe in the cool, snowy air through your nose... and blow out through your mouth like a chilly breeze.”
Repeat 3 times slowly, and model the breath with your own exaggerated inhale/exhale.

Step 4: Notice What You Feel

Ask:

“What are you feeling right now? Are you mad, sad, scared, excited?”
“What do you think the polar bear would do next?”

By this point, your child’s nervous system is already calming down. They may still be upset—but they’re starting to shift into a place of awareness instead of reaction.


🧠 When to Use the Polar Bear Pause

This isn’t just for meltdowns (though it works wonders there!). The Polar Bear Pause is also great for:

  • Transitions (getting in the car, switching from play to chores)

  • Disagreements (especially sibling scuffles)

  • Overstimulation (busy stores, birthday parties)

  • Anxiety (before school, shots, or new experiences)

And yes—you can use it too. I know I do. Parenting brings up big feelings for grown-ups too, and sometimes we need to channel our own inner polar bear before responding.


💙 What It Teaches Our Kids

More than just a calming trick, The Polar Bear Pause teaches children that:

  • They are not their feelings.

  • They can choose how they respond.

  • Their breath is a superpower.

It also teaches them that stillness doesn’t mean weakness. It’s strength. Wisdom. Strategy.

Just like our majestic bear friend.


🧊 A Final Thought from Melissa

I believe every child has their own inner guide—something strong and beautiful inside them that helps them through tough moments. Our job as parents and caregivers isn’t to fix or force. It’s to show them how to pause, how to breathe, and how to believe in themselves, one feeling at a time.

So next time things get wild, try inviting the polar bear to dinner.

Let the stillness settle.
Let the breath guide.
And let your child learn—gently, and in their own time—how powerful they truly are.


🐾 Want more tricks like this?
Check out my other posts in the Mindful Magic blog series, where we turn emotional moments into playful, growth-filled opportunities.

You’ve got this—and we’re always here to walk the journey with you. ❄️

By Melissa Meyer, DNP, PMHNP